The steps you take...

Generally it’s not the easiest job in the world for me to find a topic to write here. I really take care of the few people that take their time to come here and see what I am talking about. In this post specifically, I had some troubles defining the title. Now that I have it, I can go ahead.

I was born in a small city, moved for another one and during this period until the time that I got old enough my family lost the resources that could allow me to see the world. I needed to find my own way to do it.

Looking back the most important moment that comes up to my mind in this journey was when I tried to join the Junior Enterprise (if you don’t know what it is, check it out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Junior_enterprise ) in the engineering school. When I was accepted to the engineering course it was already the 6th call for students. Just I and one more were called that time. I saw the folder about the Junior Enterprise and went there to know how I could participate on their selection process. They told me that I couldn’t apply because they have already closed the applications to the process. I talked to the HR Manager and explained him my situation and they decided to accept me. That small act changed my life.

I joined the Junior Enterprise and got passionate enough to decide to quit the engineering course and join the business management one. It was funny because at that time, I used to spend more time on the enterprise than at the classes.

I was accepted to the business school and there I already knew: I wanted to join the junior enterprise. It’s funny but, the one from the engineering course at that time seemed to be better organized than the one in the business school. Because of that, at the beginning, I wasn’t very excited about it. But afterwards with my plans for that organization I started to dedicate more and more. In the end of my first year there, with one vote of difference I was elected president.

I had a very successful year and due to that I received the invitation to participate in almost every other student organization in our faculty and afterwards in AIESEC – the person that insisted so much for me to join AIESEC was a very special friend that have seen me working on the Junior Enterprise.

From that time on, what I have “conquered” during these years:

- I flighted for the first time in my life – from São Paulo to Porto Alegre;

- I met people from more than 10 states in my own country. I have friends on each of those states right now;

- I learned how to speak better English – even staying in Brazil – by living with foreign people;

- I spent an year working as national director and also have the chance to work closely to the most important conference held in the history of AIESEC in Brazil;

- I worked with people from 6 different countries while in AIESEC in Brazil;

- I left my country for the first time (my dream from the beginning of this post). I not only did that but I visited a total of 7 countries in less than a year;

- I’ve learned Spanish and lived in Mexico a country that stole part of my heart;

- I have friends now from all over the world. Some of them are from countries that I barely knew that they existed, before I joined this last position of regional manager.

Well, I could write here MUCH more. But that’s not the meaning of this post. The idea of it is to make you to think about the importance of that day that I needed to convince the HR manager of the Junior Enterprise of the Engineering School that I should be able to apply for their selection process. And that’s what I am asking for the AIESEC network more often right now. Why all of this people are not stepping ahead? What exactly are you winning and what are you losing just because you’re not trying to do your next steps?

There are hundreds of opportunities in our organization for good people like you and they are being left without anyone, just because nobody is applying. If AIESEC supposed to be an organization to provide you the opportunity to try, why so few ones are taking this risk?

It makes me a bit disappointed with the organization – to see that amazing people are just afraid of themselves. And this unconsciously makes me think if it’s exactly what’s happening – for example – with the politicians worldwide. If the ones that are accepting the challenges, are doing that not because they are good, but because all the others just gave up on their will to do so.

I don’t know the answer for these questions. But I will always remind the few steps ahead that I took in my life that brought me here (and also the many ones that I tried to take, but I just couldn’t).

Back to the rootz

I am currently living a very interesting experience: be back to live with my family.

It’s being an interesting experience. Somehow I can be outside of the group and analyze it... I don’t know exactly why – but I guess it’s mainly because I spent many years completely away from everyone here... I can join them, but not to make part of them anymore.

It should be bad... To do not belong to your family anymore... it should be. But I don’t feel like that. I can see now that I became a much better person in many senses. I am not saying that my family is bad. I couldn’t ever say that. But I felt clearly that some of my bad habits and behaviours, that gave me so much trouble along the way, are really much weaker nowadays. I am mainly talking about being aggressive, being negative and living with a lot of prejudice in my life. In some aspects (especially about the prejudice) I used to have a different approach of my whole family. But in the others... specially related to being aggressive I was always just like that – or one of the worse ones.

During my whole life I was criticized because of that. I always understood that I was wrong but couldn’t see how much. It’s incredible how living with my family takes it to another level. It’s common to scream, to fight all the time for everything... I changed. I am no longer that much like this.

I believe that the time spent in AIESEC changed me in this way. I am really much more de-attached of almost everything. I don’t buy almost any fight. It doesn’t seem to be worthy anymore. There are thousand other ways to get to the same endpoint – apart of fighting.

However, I am particularly surprised about this capacity of putting myself out and just understand what’s going on. I can understand my true roots... what made of me what I am right now. A clear example is about the concern about the environment, about wasting and being economic. Every single thing in my house is about reducing costs. It made of me a very cheap guy. Actually after living outside of Brazil for a while it helped me to be able to spend more money! :D

But the main learning point here for me is how we’re able to change almost anything we want – even in our personality – and into a very short span of time. If someone would stop on the past and tell me that I would be able to change that much about my personality, I would doubt forever. And I could actually do it. Some time ago I asked my first boss in AIESEC to give me feedbacks and points of improvement. He was totally right about the points that he wrote, but it was about the Marco that worked with him. I am now a very different person.

Now I would like to spend some time trying to rescue the things that I would miss from the old Marco. Something that I felt that I lost was my idealism. I used to be the person blind for an ideal - which is not the ideal state but for sure can drive a lot of good things and change many others.

After writing this post, I am asking myself if it should be a post or a page in a diary. Is it completely irrelevant? Should I have written it in a way that it could be more motivational in the line of: YES YOU CAN! or... is it good enough for people to know about me now or to inspire them to change themselves?

As I told before, I am much more de-attached to the things... so, I can say that... I just don’t care :D

John Mayer - 83 (all to deal with what I am talking about! :D)