To my future wife...

My dear,

If someday in our lives, for any circumstances the destiny decides to separate us, I want to remind myself of some things that were really important from the time that we started our relationship on...

I want to remember that the reason for us to get married was the fact that this relationship was completely meaningful for both of us. And also that most of the things that we did together gave us much more great and happy moments than bad or fighting moments.

I want to remember how simple things that you did or simply the way that you were could make me so happy. The smiles that took my breath away or almost took me to the floor. The surprises that I would never forget. How our body together even by the touch of our hands deserved to be together because together they found their own reason to exist.

I want to remember that above all the bad things that might happen that you will be always the one that gave me the most important thing of my life: our children. And they are just as perfect as they are because there is a part of you on them. And I am sure, the best part of you.

I want to remember that, above everything in my life I wanted you to be happy, just because for me that’s how it should be. And to be separate must mean that you will be happier alone or with someone else and that it means that, despite of all the hurt that I may feel for losing you or for what made us break up, I want to remember that many days you made me the happiest man I could be and I wanted you to be always able to feel the same.

I want to remember that I married you and not anyone else from your family. If for some reason they get evolved in our situation I must respect them because for them – without understanding the meaning of all that is going on – they are just aiming to protect you and probably I would do the same in their places.

I want to remember that despite of any of the materials things that now legally belongs to us, I don’t want to hurt any of my children with stupid and meaningless argues. If I would need to start from the zero to keep them away from our problems, I will do it.

And finally I want to remember the bright in our eyes. Not only in mine but also in yours that make us take the decision of spending our lives together. I am sure that the reason for us to do not stay together must be strong. But I also know the one that connected us was also really strong. I hope in the end we could finish with the same good way that we started. And somehow I hope that both of us could be happy again... as it supposed to be from the first beginning.

My Theory

When I was working in the National Board of AIESEC in Brazil we had a session during the transition time that was my favourite. It was called “My theory”. The reasons for liking it so much are many. The first, is the fact that I have so many theories. I can always laugh by myself about my own conspiracy, funny, silly theories. Also because during that time it gave us the chance to think about great things that could be implemented and really change how things were working in AIESEC there.

Well I don’t believe all the theories can change the world. At least, you can laugh about mine :D

Something like 2 days ago I was going to brush my teeth. I am here in Mexico and here is very common to see the “economic” version of the products – which means that they are really big. I was thinking how much time I would take alone to finish with my toothpaste (I just discovered how to write this word. The funny thing is that it is the same in Portuguese: pasta de dente).

And then, since I don’t have a very strong control of my brain, I started to think about a person living completely alone, working in a small and boring company and receiving a medium salary. If I was this guy... how sad would be to stare at the toothpaste and realize that I would took ages to finish it...

Besides thinking about the consequences for this person (or even for me here right now) having the desire to change the type of toothpaste that he uses, I was thinking about the fact of finding someone else to share your toothpaste. Now the toothpaste becomes a good example because it’s something more private to share than... food, i.e. but also not that much as... underwear.

So I was thinking: if this guy, working in a boring company, in the middle of nowhere, receiving a medium salary, that by the way never found the love of his life, never got completely in love with someone, or even worse, got in love sometimes and even tough never had the chance to be “happy forever” with these people that passed through his life – suddenly finds someone else.

This someone else is not the love of his life, or at least, it’s not easy to perceive it like that. But they could spend their lives together. Sharing the toothpaste, the bed, a muffin in a breakfast, a book, a dream... things that, you can do with someone that could like you and that you also could like them.

Is it bad?

I was really thinking about it. I feel like, I could be this guy one day. And... after that I was thinking that, it shouldn’t be bad. Probably these people could have a stronger and more stable relationship that most of these “happy forever” couples, breaking up in the next month because they just realized that, they are not perfect enough to share the same bed.

Yes, I am young and I still have the same dreams of the small kid in love with the beautiful teacher (actually, this example specifically, is not applicable – never got in love with a teacher, but you got the point right?). I still have the bright in my eyes and the true and deep desire to marry with the “woman of my life”. But I just don’t feel like, using one big tube toothpaste alone. Too sad to think about it. So... Am I the wrong guy about thinking that... accidently the plan B could be even better than the plan A?

I honestly don’t know... it’s just something that passed through my mind when I was brushing my teeth.